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‘I DON’T LOVE YOU ANYMORE’ IS ALL HE TOLD ME

 

I remember in 2016 one my friends told me she was getting married, I was so excited for her, as she has had her fair share of bad experiences with men. She was really confident that he was the one.

Every Instagram post from then was about her wedding planning and how much she loved her fiancé. We were reminded of her upcoming wedding at least 3 times a week on Instagram and Facebook.

She had done her introduction in 2017 and a few months after, the social media updates began to decrease. I noticed this but thought maybe it was the stress of wedding planning that didn’t allow her to continue posting.

I called a few weeks ago and she told me there was no more wedding. She said, one day her fiancé sent her a message that he doesn’t love her anymore, he could no longer pretend and the best thing for him to do was to call of the wedding – After 2 years of dating & 2 months till the wedding!

My friend is currently going through major counselling; she said she attempted suicide twice. ‘I was heartbroken, humiliated, devastated, I wanted to take my life twice’ How does one heal from such a tragic event I asked her, she said the following:

  1. Allow yourself to cry. I tried to tell myself that I was too strong to cry but then I ended up bottling it up inside.
  2. I personally took one day off work to do the unpleasant things of cancelling the wedding and then went back to work the next day to keep busy.
  3. Let yourself be comforted and know that it’s not pity but care.
  4. Once you emerge on the other side of pain, acquaintances will want to take you out for coffee. Unfortunately, everyone loves a great story and most are just curious about what happened vs care. If they weren’t someone you were going to see before, then now isn’t the time.
  5. You might have horrible insomnia, try and get close to God. Shut out all forms of social media.
  6. Book appointments with a therapist to deal with the pain.

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